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One For The Bucket Brigade!
by Dave
Friday, January 29, 2010
Tom writes in to ask, "How about doing one for the bucket dads? Everyone talks about the kids!"
You know, Tom, I would do something for the bucket dads and moms but I don't want to wallow in self-pity. So I am going to try to stick to anecdotes you and others have sent me, as well as some interesting stories I have heard or seen. I will, of course, talk about some of my personal experiences because those are the ones I know best.
Tom complains of pain he got while returning the ball to his two daughters when they practice pitched to him. As he notes, "there are no points for throwing it back on the fly." I'll add that there are no points for looking like a pro when you throw the ball back either!
I have not only caught a lot of pitching sessions, I have watched others do almost as many. One of the more comical things I have noted is the father or mother who squats like a real catcher and then tries to whip the ball back to the pitcher, again, like a real catcher. I know the mentality. I did this a few times and gave it up for personal safety reasons and to avoid pain.
Even funnier than the would be major league catcher is a fellow I know who wanted to work his daughter's ability to protect herself from line drives by whipping the ball back at her as hard as he possibly could each and every time. His throws probably maxed out at 50-60 mph. Nobody hits a ball back to the pitcher that softly beyond 10U. It doesn't do any good to whip the ball back at her if that's the best you can do. It just gets your blood up and makes her dislike you. It also will eventually burn out your arm.
Let me provide some advice to all parent catchers and this same advice was mentioned to me by Tom. Flipping the ball back on one hop is not a shameful act. It will save your arm. If your daughter is really, really going to grow up to be a pitcher, you are probably going to have to catch 2 - 4 times per week for 100 pitches and returns at the very least. A good average might be 3 times per week for 150 pitches and even that is a bit understated. That is 450 return throws per week, 44 weeks per year, over the span of perhaps an 8 year career, yields 158,400 throw backs. If you, like Tom and I, have 2 daughters, figure it out. You are going to hurt your arm!
I have a pretty bad right, throwing arm. I broke my elbow playing football when I was 15 and still have shards of bone on the inside of the elbow. I know the shards are there because my doctor warned about this at the time of the injury and, quite a while ago, I hurt it and it locked into place. When I had X-rays done, the doctor noted that he could see the shards and it was the swelling around them that had caused the lock-up. Years later, when my kids first got involved in softball, I threw a little too hard with another father before practice one day. My arm was sore for weeks after that.
Once you get the knack of throwing it back on one hop, it may actually save you time because you won't suffer all those bad throws as you try to emulate Pudge-Rod. Tom suggests that bouncing the ball back will make them better fielders. I'm not sure if it is true or not. But it certainly does not hurt their fielding ... or your arm.
The knees are probably your most abused joints. If you ski, snow or water board, that's more so. If you value your ability to walk around, up the stairs, into an elevator, I suggest trying something besides the standard catcher crouch. I am fully aware that there is a little known Medicare benefit for which you might qualify. I am slightly jealous of all those people on the TV who got their Power Chair and didn't have to pay a penny out of pocket for it. But if you are in your 40s, you will look silly making your way to the restaurant/bar/supermarket in an electrical chair. The alternative is a knee replacement but those replacements need to be replaced after a decade or so. You can count on having to replace your bad knee(s) as many as 5 more times during your life if you need your first one at 40 or so. Save your knees, get something to sit on during pitching practice!
Tom suggests a high bucket. He recommends this because 1) he has sufficient room to toss the ball back underhand and 2) he is able to get out of the way of a wayward pitch very quickly without stressing his knees too much. I prefer a lower bucket. I use one of the shortest buckets around, one I used on my boat before I got rid of the boat in favor of softball lessons. I like the shorter bucket because I can set a lower target and I want my kids to throw a lot of low pitches in order to induce grounders. But I may rethink my approach very soon as I am missing out on the benefits Tom noted.
I do not suggest spending money to get the item I have seen in stores and online. That is a stool which stands on one leg and is sold specifically for bucket dads and moms. I got one for Father's Day. It is not very convenient and I have fallen off it several times. The thing about a bucket is you can use it as a bucket in which to carry gloves and balls. It is sturdy. One cheap little plastic bucket will probably survive your kids' pitching careers and you will be able to will it to them when they become parents.
At this point I have to tell you a story or two story about buckets. I learned about them my first year of travel. The warehouse superstore was selling seeds in a bucket for a very cheap price and we decided to buy one for the team. I had hoped to recoup the bucket after the seeds were gone because it looked like it might make a good seat. But when the seeds were depleted, the team's manager, a father of a pitcher, grabbed the bucket and made it his own faster than I could possibly have grabbed it back. A month or two went by and someone took the top of that bucket and attached a proper seat cushion to it for the coach. He still has my bucket today! I think he is rather proud of it.
Another bucket brigade dad I know often catches his daughter when she pitches. He does so in pitching lessons and practice sessions, at team practices and before games. I noticed that he sits sideways on the bucket in order to protect his potential to produce children in the future. After years of watching this, I commented to my wife about it and was surprised by her reaction. She told me that when she first saw him sit sideways like that, she lost all respect for the man! She said he should sit like a real man!! So if you are at all concerned about the way people perceive you as you sit on your bucket, sit straight and protect yourself through other means.
Yet another bucket dad I know has a daughter who is a good pitcher but not always that successful when pitching against the best kids. We were conducting a tryout for catchers one day and she was pitching to them. I asked her if she had a dropball because I wanted to see the catchers block. She said she did and proceeded to throw several very good ones. I was genuinely impressed, not with the catchers but with this girl's dropball. So I asked the father about why he never had her throw the drop in games. He looked at me with a puzzled expression and said,
"Well, she really doesn't have a drop. I mean we don't work on it at all. I can't stand catching the thing. So she never works on it. I didn't think it was very good because I haven't seen her throw one in many months."
I informed him that she does indeed have a good drop. I also told him that she practices it when she throws with her younger sister, a catcher. I strongly suggested that he begin calling the pitch as one of her main ones in games. Do you know, that pitch has become her mainstay and she is a much more effective pitcher now than she was before she started throwing the drop a lot.
Yet, I understand why a father would not want his daughter to spend a lot of practice time working on the drop, at least not while he was catching it. The drop is the bane of many bucket dads' existence. I remember talking to one father who had a daughter with a good drop. He was catching her in the yard one summer evening when one pitch pointed out a tree root he had not completely removed from their throwing area. He was struck in the knee by a drop that bounded off the tree root. For months afterwards, he walked around with a softball sized bump on one leg. This guy used to wear shorts in weather above 25 degrees. But during July and August of that summer, he wore long pants due to his embarrassment.
Speaking of embarrassment, another father of a talented drop ball pitcher I know took one off his shins. He had to go in for X-rays after a few weeks of hobbling. The pain was excruciating. But this guy had some trouble with the doctor because he refused to tell the man flat out that the injury was caused by catching his daughter's pitching! The doctor wanted to know how it happened. He said "never mind." The doctor persisted relentlessly. I think the doctor finally accepted some explanation about a foul ball at a high school baseball game.
The moral of that story is shin guards are advisable. I actually don't wear them because I can't stand them. I caught until I was 18 but I never really loved wearing guards. And as an adult, I really can't handle the feeling, especially when I wear shorts. That's not a very good excuse and I have chipped bones on my shins too, though nothing that hindered my ability to walk. I guess I am pig headed and one day my daughter's dropball will convince me to wear the shin guards I have.
Tom has some advice if you also refuse to wear baseball/softball shin guards. He uses soccer style leg guards. I may have to look into this because it makes a lot of sense. But I may have trouble finding anything that fits properly. If you don't have football shaped calves, you might want to look into soccer shin guards to protect you while catching.
I have one final dropball story for you. I was at the field one day and noticed a bunch of guys from our organization standing around a pick-up truck chatting. As I walked towards them, they were laughing and making all kinds of odd faces. As I got close, one yelled out to me, "hey Dave, have you ever taken one in the ... you know?" I replied, "yes, many times, it ain't pretty, it's always the darn dropball." As I uttered the beginning of the word "dro" they all broke out into hysterical laughter. They were all pitchers' dads. They knew exactly what I meant. They all had the same experience.
I understand what Tom is saying about the higher bucket. If you are catching a dropballer, it is best to get the heck out of the way once that ball hits the ground. It has a lot of spin on it. You really do not know where it is going to go. The faster you can get out of the way, the better.
Still, I cling to my low bucket. And one of my kids is a dropballer. I have worked a way to protect myself and that is: I stay closer to the plate and when the ball hits the ground, usually it is right around the plate. I go forward rather than trying to block it like a catcher. I attempt to short hop it right near where it hits the ground so it doesn't have the opportunity to jump. It doesn't matter to me if I catch it or merely knock it away. Just so long as it doesn't jump me. So far, that technique has worked.
The worst I have ever been struck is actually on a change-up. My kid's change is pretty good. It moves and dives. When it hits the ground, it is difficult to know which direction it will bounce in. She once threw one that hit the plate, bounced up, and caught me in the chin. I saw stars. I got a nice little knot on my face that stayed there for several months. I think perhaps the bone was chipped but I never sought medical treatment because I was a little too embarrassed. I didn't need to hear another human being suggest I wear a mask. So I won't go into proseltyzing you about wearing a mask. I'll just say that there is a good reason to put one on, and leave it at that.
So to recap, a bucket is better than squatting. I prefer a low one but Tom likes a high one and he can offer some sound logic for choosing that size. Protective equipment is probably a good idea though I admit to wearing none. You must be hyper vigilant to protect yourself. And those of us too proud to admit it hurts when we get hit should probably rethink our manhood.
Speaking of manhood, I don't want to shortchange the many women who catch their daughters' sessions. I know several who, for one reason or another, do the job. They may be better athletes than their husbands are. They may just be the only one available when their daughters take their lessons. I think I know of more fathers than mothers but there are penty of each and all have their own war stories.
As a matter of fact, I know that one of the guys who laughed at my comment above no longer catches his daughter's lessons. Instead, he has his wife do that. The reason is he has become very good friends with the pitching coach. When the coach sees him, he likes to talk endlessly. The guy not only feels as if his daughter is shortchanged due to the coach's excessive conversation, but also he is concerned because he too often gets distracted from the job at hand. His daughter has hit 60 on the gun. But she is a little wild, especially when throwing movement pitches. l; He often finds himself nearly getting hit because he is too engaged in conversation. So now his wife catches the daughter at lessons. And she's the one sporting the injuries most of the time.
I really urge you in the strongest terms possible to not allow yourself to be distracted when catching. Even a 50 mph pitch can do some damage when it hits you in the head. Talking with others is possibly the most insidious form of being distracted. I just heard on the radio that the result of laws prohibiting cell phone usage behind the wheel actually have accomplished one of their objectives - to lower the rate of usage while driving. Unfortunately, the laws did not accomplish the main objective. Accident rates did not go down. While hands-free devices are used to a much higher degree than before, it turns out that they do not prevent accidents. It is the talking that yields the distraction, not the use of hands. If you try to hold a deep conversation while catching your daughter, you're gonna pay a price.
I have on many occasions found that I am not quite as wide awake as I should be when catching. Sometimes my concentration drifts. Sometimes my relatively weak eyesight takes me out of focus. That is not good.
I strongly suggest that before you get behind the plate, you make certain you are wide awake. I now very often drink a full cup of coffee before catching. I sometimes take a shower beforehand. I will try almost anything to ensure that I am as awake as possible. It is no fun to recognize that you almost got hit by that pitch.
Speaking of those times when you feel like you almost just got hit, it is difficult for those whose daughters don't yet throw hard or those who have never been part of the bucket brigade to understand our plight. The best way I can describe this is via analogy.
Do you know that feeling which immediately follows a near miss auto accident? Your adrenaline pumps at full throttle. You feel sweat start to well up in all the usual places despite having been relatively cold before the incident. Your heart pounds. You feel throbbing at your temples. That's an almost car accident. Almost being hit by a pitch is not as bad. I would say that on every pitch my daughter throws, I feel about 5 percent of the car feeling. And when I almost get hit, I suspect I reach to about 10 or 15 percent of that extreme. During the winter, we catch down in my basement which is very large. The basement is also rather cool, perhaps 45 - 50 degrees. But after we are done, I am always sweating. And when I almost get hit, I sweat profusely.
Women have more sense than men. They are more willing to don the full gear. Men are often either too lazy or too stupid unless or until their daughters become demonic hard throwers. I know of a Division one pitcher whose father always puts on the equipment. He does this because his daughter has been clocked around 67 and for one other reason. When the kid throws to him, which she still does on occasion, he abuses her psychologically. When he does this, she usually throws harder. And she, I believe, aims to hurt him. He throws the ball back at her hard a lot - he doesn't follow my one bounce advice and when he does throw it hard at her, I believe he aims to hurt her. Their sessions are rather violent. He dons the gear as a matter of survival. She should consider pitching with catcher's gear on too. Then again, she throws harder than he does.
One other item about gear, as a person who has suffered several concussions, not as a result of catching, I urge you to use the old style of catchers mask which is generally more protective of your brains. I know the newer, hockey style masks are more in vogue and look better. But the helmet part is intended to deal with foul balls. I personally do not think you need to use a helmet. And the hockey style mask provides less cushion when the mask is struck. That is my opinion formed after doing some research. You can do your own thinking and research.
The plight of the bucket dad or mom is not a well respected one. Those of you who regularly catch your daughters know of what I speak. We in the bucket brigade suffer all manner of injuries and humiliation. A little common sense can go a long way towards reducing the number of our injuries. And learning from others is at the heart of the human condition. So take Tom's advice and mine. Don't let your pride get in the way of protecting yourself. Also, when your daughter can throw a projectile hard enough to kill you, it is best not to anger her too much.Labels: parenting, parents, pitching, safety
Permanent Link: One For The Bucket Brigade!
 
Individual Motivation
by Dave
Thursday, January 28, 2010
I want to venture into a very difficult labyrinth today. I should probably just step back and not get into this but something is pulling me and I don't feel like fighting it. The issue has to do with how athletes become motivated individuals and how parents and others interact with them in order to enhance this "coming of age," if you will allow me to call it that. This is not a particularly straightforward issue to discuss. But I feel the need to try.
Some time ago, I told you that I once was told by someone far more experienced than I that a father must find the right time to step back from his softball playing daughter in order to allow her to mature in the game. She needs to be coached by someone not related to her. She needs to find her way in the real world where not everyone thinks she's wonderful, where some folks might be less tolerant of some of her bad habits. She needs to prove herself anew to someone else in the sport who has interacted with many other girls prior to meeting her. You (I) need to stand back and become a mere fan again.
Since I heard those words, I have discussed the issue and related ones many times with friends, others in softball, and even a few visitors to this site who wrote me e-mails on the topic. I agree wholeheartedly that a parent of a softball player needs to give her the room to stretch her wings, as it were, or she may never learn to fly.
I say she "may never learn to fly" because many girls have indeed gone very far within this sport while being coached by fathers or mothers. Tincher was taught to pitch by her father. Other name players had heavy parent involvement before they became name players.
Most kids need their parents to step away in order to take the steps of personal development on their own but it is not necessarily a panacea for raising a softball player. Both ways work, depending on the individuals involved. Still I agree in principle with those who argue for giving my kids space because I am not trying to raise softball players. I am trying to raise people, two individual people. I believe I need to step away from them in order for them to grow up. It's just not that easy to do!
Within the issue of stepping away from a softball playing daughter is the related one of her self-motivation. Youth is wasted on the young. If I had my life to live over again ... I would know how much effort would be involved in developing any skill to a desired degree. And, of course, I would put in the effort needed for the things I wish I were doing today!
When I was very young, I decided I wanted to be a baseball player. I was too young to have my dreams dashed so, when I told my parents, they waited several years before explaining to me why this was a bad idea. When I told my father that I wanted to play football in the NFL, he quickly pointed out that I would need to be at least 6-3 and that was unlikely. He also pointed out the short duration of a lineman's career and other problems with my idea. When I told my parents I wanted to be a mathematician, they pointed out that the only career for that kind of direction was teaching and since teaching didn't pay, I might find another career choice. They were wrong on that and other scores but I am not going to try to beat my parents into the ground today. What I want to point out is it is not a great idea merely to explain logically to a person why they can't or shouldn't do something. Instead, it is probably a better idea to inform them slowly about what is needed to become this or that and then let them find their own way.
With respect to school, my parents always wanted me to get good grades. Perhaps they wanted me to get great grades but they accepted my somewhat above average ones without giving me too much trouble. My siblings struggled in school to some degree so when I had better grades than they did, I was able to get away with less than I was capable of. But my motivation was external, not internal. I got the grades I got in order to appease them, not because I enjoyed learning or wanted to achieve at some level in order to accomplish things or make my life better. It was not until I returned to college as a 23 year old that I found self-motivation and at that point, I became an "A" student, near the top of the class, who wanted to achieve the highest grades possible regardless of the level of effort required.
Self-motivation is tricky because each of us are individuals who have our own hopes and dreams, who mature at different ages, and who have our own unique capacities and abilities. One kid is apparently fully mature, within the context we are examining, at the age of 7 or 8. Another is incapable of self-motivation until perhaps 16 or in my case, in terms of academic motivation, as old as 23. It is next to impossible to know for sure when a kid is capable of self-motivation in any pursuit.
When we start out the softball careers of our very young daughters, they really do not know what it takes to improve their skill levels and play to their potential. I recall one of my daughters, 8 at the time, telling me that she would like to throw better. We went out into the yard and threw the ball for 15 minutes before she informed me that she was tired or saw some neighbor kids playing and ran off for that action. A day or so later, I reminded her of her desire to throw better and suggested another session of catch. She told me she had something else to do and, after all, "we did play catch for a very long time yesterday." She was sure she had done enough to improve to the level she desired!
Later, when pitching lessons arose, my wife and I decided to tell the girls that they could continue pitching lessons and we would pay for them provided that they practiced an acceptable amount. We decided that 2 times per week in addition to the one lesson would be the minimum and 4 the maximum. They could continue with their lessons if they practiced twice a week but it would be better if they did more. And, if they did more, we would never consider dropping lessons. If they stuck with just 2, we might one day put an end to lessons.
So my daughters continued to pitch several times a week in order to preserve their lessons. When they wanted to play travel ball, we put certain other restrictions on them. They were required to get their homework done in a timely fashion so as to avoid conflicts with practice. They were also required to step up their pitching to a minimum of 3 times weekly in addition to lessons. If they pitched for one half hour at practice, that would count. We didn't want to burn them out. We just wanted a commitment level in order to justify our spending this much time and money to keep them in travel ball and pitching lessons.
As time wore on, my kids did what they needed to do to maintain things as they were. But sometimes that edge you need to compete was missing. I won't quantify it in this article but there is a level or degree of pitching effort one must do in practice in order to maintain proficiency levels and advance them enough to make all this worth it. Sometimes, with one kid or the other, that level was missing.
Sometimes, one or both of my daughters would complain about me making them pitch. It might not be right at the start or at the mere mentioning of "we'll be pitching at 7 o'clock tonight." It wasn't always a direct complaint. Sometimes we had just finished the warm-up and my kid would say "I'm really tired today" or "I'm still sore from all that pitching we did yesterday." Sometimes it was even more insidious like, "how many pitches are we going to do today?" And still other times, it was a matter of one kid, or both of them, putting out the bare minimum of effort in making each pitch.
Initially, I told them that I never want to be asked how many pitches we are doing. At different points I told them that I am not going to waste my time by catching them while they put forth less than 50% effort. I have actually picked up and walked out on a few occasions because I felt their effort was completely insufficient. I refuse to waste my time if they don't have their body and mind into it.
Soreness is a tougher issue because I don't want them to alter their motions because a bicep or forearm is sore. When they complain about sore muscles, I try to diagnose the problem, come up with a solution or dump practice for that day. I used to think they were using soreness to get out of practice but I have learned that my kids don't do that. When they complain about soreness, I believe them and we can usually do some skills that will not beat them up further.
As time has worn on, I have become weary from listening to my kids try to make practice shorter or get out of them entirely. It doesn't happen very often but when it does, it gets under my skin. That has been made more irritating by my often very sore shoulder, elbow, wrist or hand. A couple years ago, I developed bad tendinitis in my catching wrist which required me to soak my hand in ice water several times each day. It eventually went away but pain in my catching shoulder is a constant companion. Sometimes my elbow hurts and sometimes my hand does. I try not to complain to them about it - I don;t want to teach them how to get out of things - but when they are trying to wiggle out of practice and I'm hurting, I have less patience with the head games.
That was a while ago because gradually they have become self-motivated and that's why I am telling you this. My older daughter became self-motivated quite a bit sooner than the younger one. She loves just about everything that has anything to do with softball. Softball dwells within her very being, perhaps her soul. If she were confined to a wheelchair today, I believe she would either find a softball league for wheelchair bound persons or start one on her own. .
I know I am prone to digressions but I want to explain the wheelchair comment lest I receive some angry e-mails. When I was in my late teens, I worked as a lifeguard at a pool. One day, one of my fellow lifeguards dove into the pool and fractured his neck. He was paralyzed from pretty much the neck down though he could use his arms fairly well. The name of this fellow is Doug Heir.
Doug was an athlete before his accident. After the accident he wanted to end his life. That's pretty normal for a person in that predicament. If you love sport and one day are told that you'll never do any of the things you love, well, that's about as tough as it gets. Gradually, through the efforts of his brother and friends, Doug found the motivation to move forward with his life. Move forward, he did!
Doug became the President Of The National Spinal Cord Injury Association. He also finished law school and has been a practicing attorney. He has run for public office. He is a motivational speaker. He also has been called the most accomplished athlete on Earth because he has won more gold medals than any other human being.
Doug found his self-motivation, with help from his brother, in sport. He competed in field events at Paralympic and other world championships. He has one too many events to name and, in the process, set several world records. His image has appeared on the Wheaties box and many sports media outlets have proclaimed him the world's greatest athlete, among other noteworthy achievements.
So, you see, I do not use the wheelchair example lightly. And when I speak of self-motivation, I have seen it at its all-time low.
So my older daughter is now just about fully self-motivated. This was accomplished primarily by gradually allowing her to control the direction of her practice sessions. At every turn, I have reminded her that the game belongs to her, not us. Our purpose is to facilitate her accomplishment of what she tells us her goals are. She is never practicing or pitching for us. We enjoy watching her pitch but if she were never again to pitch, that would not change anything about the way we love her or treat her. The decision to pitch or not is hers and hers alone. The decision to play softball is hers alone.
As I say, she is just about fully self-motivated. It is a long process which requires work for the full duration. One does not one day turn from being externally motivated to being completely self-sufficient. It is a process not a watershed moment. We must still remain vigilant and work towards instilling the internal motivation.
As I say, this was a gradual growth which took place probably over a 2 year period. It probably, I don't remember, started as a result of a planned practice session at which she was not motivated. She may have complained. She may have inquired about how many pitches we were going to do. She may have thrown at less than her best. I just don't remember. But at that point, I believe I ended the session early. I was tired of the continual lack of effort - in a relative sense. I told her that she could tell me when she wanted to practice again. And I waited for her to do that.
After a few days, she missed working on her pitches and came back to me. In the next session, I let her control almost everything. There is a pattern to her warm-ups which I like to be adhered to to avoid injury. After that, it was "so, what do you want to do next." I really enjoyed asking her "how many pitches are you going to do today?" I think she understood the irony. But she chose her direction and I have to say that it was fine.
Now, what I do in order to sway her in the direction I think she should go is make suggestions. If I think her screw, drop, or drop curve is not quite as sharp as it should be, I ask, "do you want to work on X pitch today?" or "you know, you have thrown better drops, maybe we could work on that pitch more during one of our sessions this week?" or "is there any pitch that you would like to work on?" I try to sway her but I don't want to take over and I don't want her to get mentally lazy and allow me to take over. It's her game. These are her pitching sessions. If she's going to put into them, she must decide what it is she is going to do.
At various times, I think she informed me of when we were going to pitch and then, when the time came, she complained or was less than thrilled when I reminded her. Now when that happens, I react by telling her that I would love to have the hour to myself and it doesn't matter to me if she doesn't practice. She does not do that often anymore. She is responsible for her success or failure. If she wants to skip, it is entirely her decision. And she has to live with the results.
When she does complain, I generally believe she needs the time off. She has become self-motivated enough and we have informed her enough that she now knows that there is a minimal level of effort required to maintain and only through exceeding that will she get better. She wants to get better. She works pretty darn hard at it. Her practice sessions are much better. She seldom, if ever, takes a pitch off during practices.
To tell you the truth, I'm the one lacking motivation these days. She wants to pitch more often and her sessions are longer. I intervene more because I think she is overdoing it than I ever did because I thought she was doing too little.
My younger daughter is more difficult, as a general matter. She has had way too much success at almost everything from too young an age. She is very successful in school without ever having to put out much effort. Her report card is almost always better than her sister's, even when her sister gets almost all A's. When the kids take those state proficiency examinations, if her older sister scores advanced proficient on the math part, as she has many times, the younger one will score higher. She once scored a perfect score on that test. That's the way it is for her.
She was also a successful pitcher with far less practice work than her sister. The only times she would really work were after losses, expecially those in which she got hit fairly hard. It has been very difficult to get her to work at anything, especially pitching, unless she experiences some degree of failure.
She was always the biggest complainer with respect to practice. Even when she did not complain, she was far more prone to those lackluster sessions in which the effort needed to improve was missing. It probably took 3 years to find her self-motivation and I'm not quite sure I know what brought it on. Something, somehow, somewhere must have happened which caused her to recognize that she needed to work in order to succeed. And very recently, she has begun to use this self-motivation in many different ways.
I should tell you that I understand parents who tell me about their daughters, "if I didn't push her, she would do nothing. If I don't make her pitch, she won't and her ability will drop off." I am not telling you to drop everything and do all that it takes to get your daughters self-motivated. What I am telling you is that you should have this as a goal, a long-term goal.
Every kid, every person, is different. Some require more push than others just to achieve up to their 50% level. There is no particular age, no particular experience level, at which a given kid must become self-motivated. But as much as I have encouraged you to do certain things in order to have your kid become a good pitcher, catcher or whatever, I am encouraging you to find those things that will point her in the direction of becoming self-motivated. And everything you do with respect to this must leave the door open for her to become self-motivated when she is ready to do so.
This process, like the game of softball itself, is often rather difficult. Worse, while I can tell you how to fix some hitch in the swing, some shortcoming on the drop ball, or some particular fielding or throwing problem, I cannot tell you how to instill self-motivation in your child. It is a hands-on chore. Problems must be diagnosed in person. Treatment varies with the individual. Prognoses will vary. The time during which you may be able to accomplish the task is going to be different for any two kids.
I had a friend from childhood who became an Olympic medalist (a couple gold and, I think, one or two silver). He was a champion from a young age. His motivation was entirely external. He became a champion to appease his father. He was a world class athlete before he found self-motivation. But he also developed substance abuse problems. It was only after he solved his substance problems and found self-motivation that he became an Olympic champion.
I have often observed parents encouraging their kids to play hard, hustle, get a hit, etc. in softball tournaments. I have sometimes been an overbearing father with respect to my kids' softball play. I understand when parents need to be involved with their kids' softball. I also understand sideline nerves. But there is one thing we must remember and a few corollaries which spin off this single principle. It is their game - we had our opportunity already.
It is their game and we cannot necessarily relate to what it is like to stand 4o or less feet away from some hitter to guard against the bunt. We don't know what it is like to stand in against some 60 mph rise ball throwing freak of nature. We do not know what it is to live amongst their peers while suffering a tough game when everyone else is hitting the ball hard. Sure we had similar experiences but we do not know what they are going through. We have to guess.
When we were their ages, we didn't necessarily trust when our parents, teachers and coaches told us how to live. We learned most of what we know today thanks to mistakes and a few very smart mentors who taught us how to be self-sufficient. We got bored at practices. We turned our heads away on hard grounders. We complained about the duration of practices, etc. We dogged it. Why on Earth would we expect them to be any different.
When a young kid starts hitting, catching or pitching lessons, their coaches tell them what they need to do in order to prepare for the next session. "Don't forget to take 50 swings in the yard, do your blocking homework, pitch 4 times between sessions, etc." We can and should encourage our kids to hear those messages over and over again. We can tell them that if they would like to continue doing these lessons, they must practice on their own. We can make them practice but they will learn how to do it with the least possible amount of intensity to appease us. We can be perfectionists who mentally beat on our kids to make them all that we think they should be. But what is gained and what is lost when we do this?
If you think you may have the next Jennie Finch, there is probably nothing to be learned from me. If, on the other hand, you are simply using softball as an enjoyable way to teach your kid certain things, if you just want her to enjoy athletics, if you are not trying to take her up to the very top levels of the sport, then one of your goals should be to teach her self-motivation which she can use in other aspects of her life. It isn't an easy thing to instill. You will have to find your own way. But, in the long run, it is a highly advantageous thing to have taught your child. It is well worth the significant effort.Labels: mental toughness, parenting, work ethic
Permanent Link: Individual Motivation
Diamond Nation Tournaments Announced
by Dave
Thursday, January 28, 2010
There is an article on SpySoftball which consists of just a commercial announcement as follows:
"Rising Stars and Triple Crown Sports have announced two new tournaments - a summer event June 23-25, and, a fall event October 8-10, both at a new 10-field complex called Diamond Nation in Flemington, NJ.
The tournaments will be limited to 40 teams, and the sponsors hope to attract the top 16U and 18U teams from across the nation. (Flemington is 44 miles from Newark Airport.)"
That's a fairly simple message but several items should be included in order to convert this announcement into a complete statement of fact. First of all, the complex is definitely beautiful although it could have been laid out differently to make it easier to move from field to field. Personally, I favor quads to make the movement from field to field easier while also providing fans and college coaches the opportunity to see multiple games with just a few steps. Quads have issues such as when balls are fouled from one field onto another but I would take them over the arrangement at DN.
Secondly, Flemington is fairly close to Newark Liberty International Airport as the crow flies but it will most likely take you an hour or more to drive from one to the other in the best of traffic conditions. If you come in or leave at rush hour, you should budget two hours. , so You will be sitting out a lot of traffic lights along the most convenient routes. At times, you may get the opportunity to watch a single traffic light turn from red to green to red to green to red again! It is not the most convenient place to get to in New Jersey. Flemington is kind of out in a part of the state which nobody ever experiences on TV or in the movies. It is a less densely populated part of the state.
Third, the place is not a purely softball complex. It is really set up for baseball and the fields are converted to softball via the placement of fences and playing at one corner of the otherwise baseball setups where 60 foot bases paths are located. But the facts that these fields are used primarily for baseball and are somewhat inconvenient for softball is not necessarily fatal to the utility of the complex.
What may be fatal to the complex are a couple of practices by the owners of the facility, as well as the fact that the fields are 100% turf. Generally, at this complex, anyone aside from the players and coaches must pay an entrance fee. I have been to tournaments and showcases at which such a fee has been charged but usually the fee is either nominal or only applied to very large events such as a national championship tournament. The nominal fees were typically not charged by the organization hosting the tournament but rather the park itself which had significant facilities to maintain with taxpayer dollars. It is not fair to ask local taxpayers to foot the bill for maintaining fields during an event which largely draws people from far away. But DN is different because this is a commercial venture. They invested huge amounts to build this complex and are seeking a return on that investment. The charge for fans (parents) is rather hefty and the system under which, for example, a visitor can leave the complex and then return is not exactly state of the art, or, for that matter, well thought out.
Next, as part of the profi- making angle, teams are allowed to bring in just one cooler and no food. They aim to make all attendees purchase some drink and all food from the snack bars. The food at the snack bars is not necessarily good or what one would choose to eat when playing a multi-game day. But you are forced to either sneak in food - not easy - or buy whatever they have to offer at the snack bars.
Still the things I have listed are not fatal to many who wish only to play the best possible competition no matter what it costs and no matter how inconvenient the location. And while the tournaments do hope to draw a very high level of competition, the fact that the fields are turf ought to give teams cause for hesitation. Turf is great when natural fields are too wet to play. But at any other time, I would prefer to keep my players off it.
The problems that are encountered on turf are many. The most obvious issues involve ground balls. Most balls are hit with considerable spin in fastpitch softball. Turf does not act like dirt when a spinning ball hits it. Grounders are a little too true. If you put a team on turf for a year and then had them play on dirt, say at ASA, NSA, etc. nationals, you are looking for trouble. Your infielders will not be able to adjust back to the unpredictability and much different play of real dirt on a skin field. It isn't quite as bad as always playing on grass infields but it is rather different than playing on a conventional softball field.
Next, outfield play is different on turf vs. natural surface. We've played all sorts of grass including some amazingly well groomed fields in the Carolinas and Florida, some very nice but quite different type surfaces in Caifornia, some dreadfully hard ones in Ohio, some not very well groomed natural grass surfaces in several other places, etc. I have seen some artificial surfaces for softball fields that were very nice on which the outfield hops were quite similar to those on natural surface but such is not the case at DN. Ordinary hump back line drives and pops that fall to ground bounce inordinately high leading to misplays as well as extra base hits for balls that would easily be played back in for singles on other surfaces. Outfielders must play fairly deep because any ball that strikes the surface will run rather fast. Any single hit beyond a certain point is going to make it to the fence. Playing outfield at DN isn't at all like playing on natural surface or very good turf.
Finally, the pitching surfaces are not great. The turf itself is rather slick. Girls sliding into bases do not get any kind of rug burn because of the slickness. Instead, they find that they need to grab hold of the bases in order to avoid over-sliding the bags. This does not help pitchers find that point of resistance with their landing legs which they need to pitch well. Further, the pitching circle areas are a carpet overlay on the normal surface of the field. There is too much give in them. There is a sort of trampoline effect. Every pitcher I have talked to had something bad to say about the pitching area at DN.
I have nothing against Diamond Nation. I don't particularly care about the site's distance from Newark Airport nor that you have to buy food there. I can go a day without eating though I would rather be able to bring in my own water and Gatorade. It can be a little too expensive ov er a 3 or 4 day tournament to pay snack bar prices in order to avoid dehydration or heat exhaustion.
I understand the need to charge a fee to attendees at commercially maintained fields. I am OK with that as a general matter. If there is a nice place to sit to watch games, it's fine with me that I have to pay provided the fee is not exorbitant. The fees are too high at DN. There is not a convenient place to sit and watch. I would like to be able to come and go in accordance with my team's schedule. It is not very convenient to come and go at DN. Actually, it is kind of a hassle though hopefully they will get better at handling this.
I am happy for whatever softball facilities are built which enhance girls' abilities to play even when a summer is very rainy. Most of us east of the Mississippi suffered through last year playing much less frequently than we would have liked. Turf is great when you have nothing else playable. But given the choice between turf and a dry natural surface, I would rather have my girls on the natural one. You really do not get to see kids' and teams' abilities when you play this kind of artificial surface. This is more true at the highest levels. At least that's one man's opinion.
Additional Comment:
My wife just read this post and reminded me that parking was absolutely horrendous at this facility. I suppose I had forgotten that fact but now that I think of it, it was really bad. There was not a huge amount of teams there when we played but we struggled to find a parking spot. I can only imagine that with a large number of teams present the parking would be absolutely impossible. Hopefully they will rectify the parking situation before these tournaments are held since they cannot support the number of cars one would expect.
Permanent Link: Diamond Nation Tournaments Announced
Easy But Neglected Skill
by Dave
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
Among the several skills coaches often neglect is the ordinary backhand play. Often folks act as if it is a difficult skill requiring more athletic ability than other plays but that's just not the case. Backhanding is as easy as any other skill but the fundamentals must be taught, reinforced through proper simple, repetitive drilling followed by sufficient iterations of live hit balls.
All too often when coaches hit grounders to players, they either hit them directly at them or hit too many to their glove hand side. If a coach has been properly emphasizing to their players to get in front of the ball and make plays between their legs, it is natural for girls to do this in a ground ball line, thereby getting no practice on backhands. I very seldom see coaches hitting backhand plays over and over again whether in practice or as a warm-up before games. l; the one exception is the short hop drill in which coaches hit balls sharply to girls stationed close in. That's a good drill but it only involves a limited piece of potential backhand plays. And usually no instruction on fundamentals has preceded it.
Generally, players learn backhanding of balls at their waists and above via normal everyday games of catch. Watch a bunch of players throwing a ball around for any length of time and sooner or later someone will make a bad throw requiring a backhand catch. After a couple years of warm-up tossing, most girls can handle any throw that requires a backhand catch. Often players learn to catch very well using backhand because it places a player in better position to make ensuing throws. If you want to be in position to make a quick throw, you move your body so as to catch the ball using a backhand because it is easier, most of the time - excluding outfield to infield cutoff throws. So backhand becomes the preferred way to receive a throw most of the time. Yet, on grounders, receiving the ball either to the glove hand side, beyond the leg while on the move or fielding it between the legs are the most reinforced skills. We do not automatically teach the backhand. We do not make sure our infielders and outfielders get enough drilling and practice at this very important skill.
If you can honestly say that your players do get adequate instruction and practice reps with backhand, OK. Today's column is not for you. If you're not sure or know that you have not addressed it, read on.
The first item to address is the teaching of the fundamental skill. Every infielder in a good ready position should be low. When they field balls, they should remain low. That is as true for other skills as it is for backhand. But for whatever reason, one of the most common mistakes in the backhand is a tendency to stand up or slightly erect when making a play on the ball. Ideally, the backhanding player should be very low. Ideally, her eyes should be just slightly above the level she gets the ball at. If a player's head is several feet above the track of the ball, she will probably misjudge it and end up with the ball bouncing off her glove or going under it.
Secondly, in every other instance of fielding a ball, the glove is held in front of the body. If a player places her glove at the same depth as her body relative to the ball, we correct her by saying, "get those out in front of you." It is always better to get a ball closer towards the direction it is coming from whether fielding a grounder, a fly, or thrown ball. The same is true for backhand. The glove must be placed towards the direction of the ball. You should not be attempting to make a backhand play parallel to the depth of your foot or head. I suppose it is often difficult for coaches to see how deep tor shallow the glove is relative to the player but this needs to be corrected just like it is on ordinary grounders hit directly at players.
The next most common error in backhanding occurs at the point at which the ball has struck the glove. Just as with other plays, the glove hand should squeeze the ball. Most often girls try to cradle the ball by cocking their wrists and pulling the hand in out towards the outside of the elbow. This is not only a poor way of catching the ball, it tends to put the player off balance and the glove in a bad position from which to remove the ball. Many beginning players working on backhands will do this to make sure they get the ball. Even experienced girls who have poor backhand skills will do this for the same reason. But when you catch a thrown ball above your waist in a backhand position, you don't do this. Instead, you squeeze the ball in your catching hand while holding your wrist loose and allowing the force of the ball to carry your hand backwards. This is what we call having soft hands.
The reason catching with soft hands is better is because when you cock your wrist towards the outside of your elbow, you are in a position which takes away from your hand strength. The connective tissue in the hands is stretched to a weaker position from which to grip anything and you tend to use weaker muscles in your forearm in a position from which their strength is diminished. Your grip is stronger when your hand is slightly cocked towards the inside of your elbow which is what occurs when you use soft hands. You are also in a better position to deal with the impact of the ball when your wrist is slightly loose and you catch the ball in front of you. Your body acts as a shock absorber.
The last fu tndamental mistake we want to deal with today occurs after the ball has been successfully caught and a throw needs to be made. The girls I have coached tend to stand upright at this point. They want to gather themselves and then make a strong throw. But usually you can make a stronger, quicker throw if you stay low, plant the correct foot while turning your body and removing the ball from the glove simultaneously. If you are a righty, that means you stride with your left leg, get the ball, and as your glove comes back towards your body, you step with the right leg, plant the right foot while turning your body so that your left shoulder faces the target and then make the throw. Staying low and planting your throwing hand foot beyond your glove hand foot is the key to making a strong, quick throw.
I would begin my backhand practice but talking about the points I have just gone over. Then I would demonstrate the correct way to make a backhand play. After that, I would use a few very simple drills in a progression which gradually goes over the skill.
The first item should be merely retrieving the ball using a backhand. All that is needed is for each girl to get in a good ready position and a coach to bounce balls at them. The player and coach can be just ten feet apart with the coach to the glove side of the player. Have her take a single step with the glove side foot, across her body while staying low and fielding the bounced or rolled ball. The coach can roll several reps and then bounce several more or mix it up anyway he or she wants.
After this drills, you want to increase the difficulty slightly. From the same basic position but two additional strides away from the player, the coach again rolls or bounces balls but this time the player must take three strides to retrieve the ball. The player strides with her glove side leg once, then again with the throwing side leg, then finally with her glove hand leg. Stay low! Then she fields the bounced or rolled ball.
If players do not take the right steps, I suggest having them walk through it once or twice, as needed. if she still struggles, stand in front of her with your back facing her. Then each of you do it as she watches you and makes sure she is doing the same thing as you. In the case of a three step drill, which is usually where the footwork first gets mixed up, I would make the demonstration while calling out 1, 2, 3. The turn around and watch her walk through it while you call 1, 2, 3.
You want to get as many reps as timne permits doing these drills. Once you have a reasonable number in, you can add to either or both drills by making players get into throwing position after fielding the balls. Again, a slow numbered walk through should teach the steps if anyone struggles.
If you only have time to do the first two drills, with no throw maneuver, because your time runs out, that's OK. Thge next time you get together, run through the basic drills quickly and go into the throwing maneuver next. Each time you work on backhands, begin with the basic drills for a couple warm-up iterations. Then go into the throwing maneuver. Next run these two drills with more than a mere throwing maneuver by having the girls make an actual throw to a point on a diagnonal from where they field the ball.
After this, assuming you have sufficient space, I would perform the same two basic drills but have girls make throws to each of the various bases from all the potential points on the field from which they would have to make such a play. After these drills have been run and only after they have been run, you can start to hit live balls for the purpose of reinforcing the fundamental skills in more realistic circumstances. At each of your practices in which you do the old normal ground ball drills, you should make a couple minutes freed to do some bakhand practice both from close points requiring a single step and from further out requiring more of a run. Obviously, with respect to your outfielders, the run should be much further. But your middle infielders need to learn to take several strides and then make a backhand play.
After you have done these things, you can get into more complex drills using backhands like diving for balls, getting up and making the throw. But for now, these very fundamental skills which are almost always neglected, should vastly improve your infielders' and outfielders' play.Labels: coaching, defense
Permanent Link: Easy But Neglected Skill
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